it's been a long week in sydney, i came about three days early and wish i hadn't, but i think i've already covered those thoughts. ended up in canberra which was sort of unexpected. nice time though.got to meet kaia's new inlaws before the parentals did so that was nice. we went to a park and had some food and played frisbee and kicked around a ball - i would never ever see my family doing that so it's nice to see some families are active.
while in canberra last night i went to see Strange Bedfellows which was really quite good - nearly didn't go but i'm glad i did. i went by myself as ki and mark were at mark's brothers' engagement party. i think it's possibly the first movie i've seen alone and i found it to be a rather good thing....you don't have to worry about anything, just about the movie. good stuff. i think everyone should go see it.
we left canberra at around 7:20am this morning. ki said we were getting up at 6:30 and leaving by 7am. my body clock woke me at 6:29 - champion, but mark and ki did not emerge until 6:55am, pretty slack hey.
felt really sick on the way home but a bit better when we had got back to hornsby. i went and had lunch with my friend chris and then came back home to find a good number of people in the house, then about an hour or so later mark's parents and two of his brothers arrived, so there's been people all over the place. tonight they all had spaghetti and lasagna..(sp?) ....i made soup for myself, not the best soup i've made, not thick enough and there weren't as many spices availabe here as i'd usually use - maybe cos i took them all with me to newie.
played a bit of pool and chatted with people. a good night in the end.
ki and mark's engagement party is tomorrow at 12 till 4 so i am palnning to get a 4:51 train back to newcastle.....wish i could go now but that probably wouldn't be received very well, esp since adam isn't going to be there so me not being there would look a bit slack.
tired now.
sleep now.

**decided to delete the first part...hmm....**
anyway....
i came down to sydney early, i was planning to come on wednesday but woke up this morning and had a sudden urge to leave newcastle... i miss it already and want to go back.....but it i go back i probably wouldn't get my assignment done and it's due next week and i haven't started it yet. i'm afraid of procrastinating forever and not getting it done.... little help? is anyone actually good at research type things and wants to help me? *looks around at blank faces* ...thought so. *sigh*......ok, well now that i'm talking to no one i might go to bed. my fingers are getting cold.

i decided while i'm up i'd jot some things down. it sort of hurts to type after a game of knuckles with howie...well not a game, i said 'let's play knuckles' he said 'how do you play?' i took a shot at him, he took one back, then said 'ouch, that hurts' and backed off. HA. so yeah, now my right hand it starting to swell around my knuckles.
I went into westfield today and didn't see a single person a knew. it was great. usually i see lots and have sort of half assed trivial conversations and then end by saying we should catch up sometime and then never do.
the flurescent light is making me sleepy.
it was good seeing ryan tonight. i miss eating bread with him. ....tomato and avocado on cobb.........mmmmmn yum. i remember once when i was sick last year and had lost my voice but forgotten and tried to ask the french hot bread lady for a cobb but nothing came out when i tried to speak. oh, when i say 'french hot bread lady' i mean the lady from French Hot Bread not a french lady who is hot and sells bread....... that would be wrong in many ways...one being that she's phillipino, not french.
i think bed is in order. night.

from ryan and howie

from howie

from lesley

I am going to be seeing kaia in two weeks and a bit. I'm very exctited about it...i haven't seen her in ages and i know that i probably spent the same time away from her last year but it feels different when she's so far away.... Tasmania doesn't even seem like part of Australia..... It might even float away.. i hope not. Also, now that she is engaged she seems a bit further away... and it means she'll be living with the Markster and won't be at home in Hornsby when i'm there.
Kaia and i used to have a pretty crappy realationship, as sister sometimes do. I remember us stabbing eachother with our finger nails and having fights about sharing a bedroom. Back in those days i would have to watch The Panel with no sound and then listen to my walkman where it was broadcast on triple j or some such radio station.
When i started to hang around with 'her' friends she got annoyed, very annoyed. Which is probably one of the reason i left st pete's to go to st john's - extra amusing because she eventually ended up at st john's and now is friends with all the people i used to be friends with and don't really see anymore.....maybe it's the gay thing...i don't know, that church was always a bit clicky, but i think they all are.
Kaia was the first family member i came out to. i remember that night... Katherine was over and so was Alyssa. I walked Ki up the road saying i needed to talk to her, i don't know what i actually said or she said but she gave me a hug and everything was dandy.
It's sort of strange because eventhough we spent so long fighting as kids we are quite close now. I used to think that siblings that got along well were sort of freaky, but i think some people just have a better start. All those years sharing a room was definately not a good start.
I still have a few of the letter's she wrote me over the years...some are lovely and some are sort of aggressive 'get out of my quad' stuff....which is a bit funny now.
I regret that we weren't able to have a good relationship earlier, when we were living closer to eachother. It would be great to go have coffee with her and chat about stuff on a regular basis.
I really miss my big sister.

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