abitofanish

dream

i had a dream last night that i went to the station (in hornsby) and i wanted to know when the trains came so i went up to a little coffee place to ask. but when i got there em g was working there, so i tried to avoid getting served by her but it just got too hard and then she said 'erin, did you want a coffee?' and i said 'no, i am going to catch a train' and then i walked away. it's so evil. i want to forget about her, well actually she wants to forget about me - i have no issues with her....anyway i just want some closure....but as long as she doesn't give me closure she'll keep popping up in my dreams and saying stupid things to me. but she won't give me closure because she just doesn't care anymore. our friendship was just based on the fact that making me happy made her feel better about herself...... how shallow is that. and how much did she lie at the time when i actually thought she gave a shit about me? it's all really fucked and i should get over it but frankly it just hurts. it's like if someone was feeling low so they adopted a kid and it made them feel better so they just left the kid on the side of the road to get run over. the kid's feeling didn't matter because the person that had adopted them was happy now.